


Ten O'Clock

by hunters_retreat



Series: The Clock Verse [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean goes with Sam to Stanford, M/M, Stanford Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-06-12
Updated: 2009-06-12
Packaged: 2018-09-15 08:38:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9227000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunters_retreat/pseuds/hunters_retreat
Summary: Dean meets with someone but hides it from Sam.  Or he would if Sam didn't know him so damn well.





	

 

Dean stared at the man before him and shook his head.  He told Sam he’d be coming home late tonight, but if he’d known how this was going to turn out, he wouldn’t have bothered coming at all.  At least Sam didn’t know.  Sam hadn’t asked in the eight months they’d been at Stanford and Dean hadn’t said anything.  Not that there was anything to tell.

 

 

“So let me get this right.”  Dean said, letting his eyes drop to the bottle in his hands.  He knew the bar well enough but he wasn’t a regular there.  The people might remember the tall kid that came in with the green-eyed guy, but no one would know their names or be able to say anything more than they came from time to time, drank a little, played pool or darts together, then left. 

 

 

To anyone else it might look like just a couple of guys out for the night, and in some ways it was since it was just the two of them, but they kept their skills up, kept the hustle ready in case they ever needed it again.  They pushed each other in pool and darts and made observations about the people around them to stay in the game.  They might not be hunting full time, but neither was willing to forgo the skills all together. 

 

 

“You drove all this way to get help on a hunt?”  

 

 

The thing was, when he looked up again, there wasn’t a thing in the other man’s face that said he might be ashamed of the fact.  Ashamed that for the past eight months he’d written his sons off.  Ashamed that he hadn’t answered the phone once when Dean had called.  Ashamed that he hadn’t returned a single goddamn message Dean had left.

 

 

“It’s important Dean.  If we leave tonight we c-”

 

 

“No.” 

 

 

John stopped, his eyes narrowing.  “What did you say?”

 

 

“I said no.  Sam has midterms this week and I have to work.”

 

 

“This is a hunt Dean.  This is real.  These people need help.”

 

 

“Then I suggest you find a hunter to help you because we aren’t hunting anymore.” 

 

 

It wasn’t entirely true.  He and Sam still hunted when Dean sniffed out something local.  They took long weekends sometimes and hunted, but John didn’t need to know that.  The truth was that Dean was too hurt to stand the idea of letting Sam anywhere near John.  He didn’t think he had it in him to back Sam down from John right now and he didn’t trust what his brother would do without him in the middle.  He’d never trusted John without it. 

 

 

“I’m disappointed.”  John said and part of Dean’s heart dropped to his stomach. 

 

 

“So am I.”  He said, before he could stop himself.  The way John’s eyes widened seemed to spur Dean on though, as if his father’s surprise made it all so clear.  John really had expected Dean to just saddle them back up and head out with him tonight.  He thought that after eight months of living with Sam and having a life together he would still be the same.  He expected to see the son he’d held under his thumb, not the man that he’d become.

 

 

“If you’d tried calling, just once, in the last eight months I might have gone.  If you’d just picked up the phone and asked if we were doing okay, I might have believed this was just an excuse to check up on us.  You didn’t though and all I can see this as, is a man who needs soldiers.  Go find someone else to be your backup John, because Sam and I are done with it.”

 

 

“You think you can speak for Sam now?  You think you can keep me from my son?” 

 

 

He could practically feel John’s anger and he knew that he was trying to play Sam against him, trying to make him feel bad for not including Sam in this.  It wouldn’t work.   Dean did a lot of things, but he didn’t talk for Sam, not unless he knew his brother’s mind well enough to expect support from it.  Unlike John, who thought to force his children’s lives by playing them against one another, Dean and Sam knew one another and if John thought a few comments could get between them he was mistaken.

 

 

“Your son?”  Dean spat the word back at him.  "I'm the one that raised him, not you.  I was the one that made sure he was fed and had the right sized clothes while you were busy making sure you had hunting gear.  I was the one that talked to his teachers on the phone, pretending to be you, the one that signed his permission slips and his report cards.  I’m the one that watched out for him and made sure he knew right from wrong.  Don’t ask to see your son, because the only one you can lay a claim to is the one in front of you.”

 

 

He stood and knocked back the rest of his beer, sitting it back on the table.  “Too bad what you taught him was that he wasn’t worth your time, otherwise he might have given you another chance.”

 

 

When he walked away his father was speechless.  The Impala roared to life under his hands and when he looked back he could see his father’s outline in the doorway, so much like the night he’d left with Sam to come to California in the first place. 

 

 

His hands were shaking by the time he got home, the adrenaline rush of walking out on his father finally wearing off.  He made it inside, wishing he’d been home a half hour before but he’d taken a longer route to make sure John wasn’t following him back to their place.  There was no doubt in Dean’s mind that John would be able to find them, but he wasn’t going to make it easy on him.

 

 

He walked in and barely registered Sam studying at the table, as he walked straight to his room and sat on the edge of the bed, kicking his shoes off.  He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, bringing his head to rest in his hands to try to get rid of the guilt he felt for walking away.  He knew it was what his father was hoping for, what his father had always been able to use against him, this guilt that he wasn’t the perfect soldier, that he would put his own welfare before others, especially before his family.  But this was best for Sam and it was time for Dean to face that Sam was all he had left of family now.  He’d made that choice and their father would never forgive him for it, just as Dean would never regret making it.  He was Sam’s, always his.  Even Sam knew it, had spoken it once, thanking him for being Sam’s.  Like Dean could be anything else.

 

 

He felt the arm around his shoulder at the same time he felt the bed dip beside him.  “Dean?”

 

 

He held his breath to keep from sobbing because the last thing he needed was to feel like he wasn’t strong enough to help Sam.  He’d failed at everything else he’d ever tried, he couldn’t fail Sam.

 

 

“I’m here Dean.”  Sam said, pulling his brother closer into his side.  “It’s just the two of us man, you gotta let me in.”   

 

 

He couldn’t say what had happened, couldn’t tell Sam how much he’d hoped John had finally come around and was ready to show Sam how proud he was of him, of how glad he was Dean had done as he was always told and taken care of Sam even if it meant leaving the hunt and his father behind.  He couldn’t explain how hollow he felt without that hope.

 

 

“You should be studying Sam.”  Dean said gruffly, knowing how seriously Sam took his class work. 

 

 

“Study break.”  Sam said softly.  “As long as I need to take one.”  


Dean shifted slightly, grabbing Sam and pushing him back onto the bed as he wrapped his arms around him, pulling him until he was laying back with his head on Dean’s chest.  Just like when they were kids and Dean needed to know Sam was safe at night, just like he did after the really bad hunts when something had happened to one of them.  Sam didn’t fight him, just rested one hand against Dean’s hip and pulled himself in a little tighter. 

 

 

He felt Sam looking up at him, felt the shift of his body as he whispered against his skin.  “Sorry.”

 

 

“Not your fault.”  Dean said, feeling something loosen in him because he knew Sam understood without him having to say the words.

 

 

“It is.  I left and you left because of me.  I’m not sorry about that though.  Just sorry he doesn’t understand.  Sorry he doesn’t see you like I do.”

 

Dean didn’t say anything else, but he kissed the top of Sam’s head and let his hand run down Sam’s back in a comforting motion.  Sam relaxed further into him and as soon as he felt Sam fall into sleep Dean relaxed too.  It was only ten o’clock and he had tomorrow off so he could get up and try to get some things done, but with Sam asleep against him and this feeling that just maybe, he was enough for Sam at that moment, he didn’t want to be anywhere else.  Instead, he listened to his brother’s breathing until he fell into dreamless sleep.

 

 


End file.
